Dani's life as a human...

Spying on a baby in my neighborhood...

2010-08-21T05:12:00.000-07:00

Is there something wrong with me? I have become obsessed with this other baby that I can see when I turn on my video monitor! They must live nearby, but where? I don't recall anyone having "It's a Boy!" balloons up on my block, or on Bancroft. I am assuming that they live on Greeley. I rarely drive on that block.

In any case, when the baby was really small, they had their monitor set for channel B. Mine is on A, so just a simple switch and there's a tiny baby. Then the people switched to the same channel! I was so upset! Hey! Now I can't see your baby! (Well, I can, I just have to walk around the house/backyard covering the antenna just so, and then I can see for a second...)

I was watching him grow! I was reminiscing about Grace being so small, really.

To my surprise 2 days ago, he was back on channel B! Hooray! I see him sitting in the swing for a really long time. I think he's about 4 months old now. I bet his dad was watching him, cause he was in there a long time! ;)

So then, last night, I laid in bed and turned on the monitor to check in on Grace. Switch, let's check out the baby boy. Cute, so small, with those tiny sleepy noises. And then I fell asleep. At about 6 a.m. I hear, "My baby, you're up?? Hi cutie pie! What a big boy, let's change your diaper! Stinky! I love you! Did you have a nice sleep?"

I felt bad listening, but I kept on, for like a half an hour. I couldn't help myself! I listened to the diaper change, the morning feeding and play time. I really feel like when you're a mommy, getting up with your baby is more intimate than sex on your wedding night. Really! There's something so special about that time. It's not exactly the same as the baby gets older. (Don't worry Grace, I still love waking up with you in the morning!)

I'll tell you one thing though, I will not be taking Grace out of the crib in the morning right after I get out of the shower anymore, just in case they are watching me too!

OUNCES and the UK (GB?)

2009-08-01T12:03:00.000-07:00

When you look at some baby bottles, they have a different set of ounce markings for the US than in the UK, strange, no? It has been bothering me so much that I had to look it up. Apparently, others find this odd as well, because it seems to be a commonly written about topic on the Internet. So, according to Wikipedia, "The British fluid ounce is smaller than (about 96%) the US fluid ounce, because the British quart is divided into 40 fluid ounces whereas the US quart is divided into 32 fluid ounces. http://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Comparison_of_the_imperial_and_US_customary_measurement_systems

Hold on though, the quarts aren't the same to start off with either!! Oh, just read the link if you want to know why...

The New York Post

2009-02-22T05:41:00.000-08:00

The post offers this statement in regards to the cartoon they published last week.

THAT CARTOON

Last updated: 9:21 am
February 20, 2009
Posted: 8:00 pm
February 19, 2009

Wednesday's Page Six cartoon - caricaturing Monday's police shooting of a chimpanzee in Connecticut - has created considerable controversy.

It shows two police officers standing over the chimp's body: "They'll have to find someone else to write the next stimulus bill," one officer says.

It was meant to mock an ineptly written federal stimulus bill.

Period.

But it has been taken as something else - as a depiction of President Obama, as a thinly veiled expression of racism.

This most certainly was not its intent; to those who were offended by the image, we apologize.

However, there are some in the media and in public life who have had differences with The Post in the past - and they see the incident as an opportunity for payback.

To them, no apology is due.

Sometimes a cartoon is just a cartoon - even as the opportunists seek to make it something else.

I have to say, I agree the Post. If you don't like the cartoon, don't buy the post. What the hell happened to Freedom of Speech in this country? Boo, hoo...some things that people say are offensive for so many reasons. Words can hurt your feelings. Blah, blah, blah...

Anything and everything that artists (cartoonists, painters, writers, teachers, engineers...really anyone who creates anything) create is open for interpretation. On the news this morning, there are many people from the NAACP demanding that the cartoonist gets fired. FIRED! Oh come on now, get over it.

25 Random things about me!

2009-01-31T05:50:00.000-08:00

This blog post is for Facebook!

Once you've been tagged, you are supposed to write a note with 25 random things, facts, habits, or goals about you. At the end, choose 25 people to be tagged. You have to tag the person who tagged you. If I tagged you, it's because I want to know more about you.

1. I like to do puzzles. Sudoku is very addictive. I like tetris a lot. Word puzzles, number puzzles or any type of logic puzzles are awesome. I am NOT a fan of crossword puzzles! See #2.

2. I do not believe in memorizing useless facts. I always hated history classes growing up because no one told history like a story of what was happening. I was just told to memorize whole loads of 'nonsense' for tests that I would just never use in my teenage mind anyway). My mantra would be, "Why do I have to remember this if I could just look it up in a book?" Now, I feel like an idiot because I just do not know very much about world history! Because of this piss-poor attitude, I am very, very bad at crossword puzzles. I just can't catch up on facts. If only I were taught to like history more!

3. I do believe in learning stuff in depth. So although I will not sit down and study facts, I do have lots of in depth knowledge about lots of stuff. Just not about history.

4. I have always yearned to be someone that just remembers movie lines and can blurt them out and make people laugh.

5. The first time my hair was red was right before my 16th birthday. My mom would not comply with my requests to do it for me, so I tried to "Shampoo it in". Unfortunately, I only used 2 boxes, and had about 3 feet of hair at the time. It came out really bad. My mom brought me to the salon and we dyed it darker and cut it short right before my sweet 16 party. My 16th candle was very sad about this, he loved my hair!

6. I am very bad at throwing out old crap that I find somewhat sentimental. If you wrote me a note in high school, I probably still have it.

7. I have two sets of priorities. The first set matches my fantasy life. This list goes like this: "This Saturday I will spend the day in my crafty office room, creating my baby shower invite, scrap-booking and possibly making some earrings I've been meaning to create and start on some pom-pom bunnies for Easter. I will call some friends I've been meaning to catch up with. I will stop to eat momentarily and listen to good music the whole time. I will do this all day long! I will end the day conquering some gigs in Guitar Hero."

The second set sounds like: "I will waste an hour on the Internet, clean up the house, do some laundry, go pick out some tile for the bathroom, get something to make for dinner, go home and try to make an invitation for my baby shower, but I will run out of time because I will have to make dinner or even better, go out to get some, spend time with Len watching TV and folding laundry. Somewhere in this time I also have to write a long-winded e-mail to the Kindergarten staff about what they should be teaching this month, although we've already talked about this for 2 and a half hours a week ago. If we feel up to it, it's mildly possible that we might go to see a movie. I will go to sleep hoping to use fantasy life priority list tomorrow."

8. I now have this on my life 'to-do' list-teach Bill how to add and Antonio how to multiply (without memorizing the multiplication table!)

9. I love my job and take it more seriously than most people feel is necessary.

10. I want to own my own business so that I can work more flexible hours but still educate at the same time.

11. I have always wanted to get a PhD.

12. I always wonder if I should contact friends that I've lost touch with.

13. I really, really, really like animals.

14. I love cursing and even better, I love listening to other people curse. I don't actually curse as much as others I know.

15. I am very bad at doing physical activities unless I try really hard and practice. I am nowhere (and I mean NOWHERE!) near a 'natural' dancer or sports player.

16. I like tiny things.

17. I like to help people that need help.

18. I love listening to guys talk about girls when they don't know that I am listening.

19. I am sneaky.

20. The PC changed my life in college. My mac has invigorated my life.

21. I will go to any concert if you have an extra ticket.

22. I wish that Martha Stewart were my friend and that she'd invite me to be a guest at one of her houses. She provides so many thoughtful little things for her guests!

23. I wish that I didn't live in NYC.

24. I love hanging out with everyone, especially late at night when more goofy things tend to happen.

25. I value my marriage and my friendship with my husband. *Although that's the obligatory, you must say something about the one you are with in this thing, otherwise you will look like a heartless jerk #, I really do feel that way and look forward to how our life will turn out!

Baby Names

2009-01-01T06:38:00.001-08:00

"So, have you thought of any baby names?" About 4 people ask me this question every day. Sometimes I don't know what to say. Of course I've thought of names, the problem is when you talk about names everyone else has an opinion too. Then you find yourself debating (or defending) names that you like. In reality, I don't care if people don't like the names that I like. It wouldn't stop me from choosing a particular name. I guess what bothers me is how other people get offended when I tell them about the names that I dislike. I have pretty strong opinions about names and being a teacher influences that a lot. The moral of story is, 'Don't ask the question unless I can bash your baby names too'.

Here is my naming criteria for girls. I do not have such regimented rules for boy names. The first set of rules has to do with children whining.

1. It cannot be an ultra-girly long name. If it has 4 or more syllables, well then that is really ridiculous. Why does it have to be so damn long. These names can be whined by a sibling in a really long, annoying way. "ALLLL-EEEEEEEEEX-AAAAAAAN-DRIIIIIIIIIIIIII-AAAAAAAAAAAAAA keeps looking at me and making faces." Oh, I just can't stand that. That being said, some names are nice (but I repeat, not most) such as Olivia. The problem with that name is that it is in the Top 10 baby names people chose in America in the past few years. See below for more on that.

2. Three-syllables don't make the cut for me either. This raises lots of eyebrows. Most people seem to like three syllable names. Listen, the name can still be whined. Furthermore, it takes one more syllable for me to yell out the name when I am mad, unless there's a good nickname for it. When I think of all of the people I know, the women with three syllable names just seem to be more of a pain-in-the-ass than friends with one- or two-syllable names. You can decide for yourself where you belong, there is a fine line that you can cross over.

3. Any possible 3-syllable names cannot end with -na. Christina, Arianna, what-ever-na. *Whining.

4. The name cannot be one of the most popular names in the last 10-15 years. I didn't go to school (until high school) with anyone named Danielle and I liked it. If I had to be called Danielle P. for 6-9 years I would have went out of my mind. Therefore the following pretty names are out-Emily, Emma, Sophia, Isabella, Ava, and Olivia. Can you believe that Madison has been in the top 10 for the past 10 years? Almost 1% (0.85%) of kids born last year have this name. Madison A., B., C., D., E., F...Too many! Just too many!

5. The name cannot be a name that a good friend really likes or has used already. This is a crappy rule, but its just not nice to be a name stealer. If anyone wants to *gift* a name to me though, I may take you up on it...Renee, this means you. You better have a girl named Julia one day. You hear this Bill? Coach those sperm for girls now!

This leaves me with short names. I like older names. Helen (my mom's mom), Anna (dad's mom was Ann), Grace, Rose. Basically, if your grandma had the name, I probably like it. Today I found out that Helen was a very popular name in America from 1908-1930. See http://www.ssa.gov/OACT/babynames/top5names.html

There you have it. Those are some possible names and reasons why I chose them. Maybe you'll approve. Maybe you won't. You can say that my names suck. I don't care. You may love luscious long names and may have one yourself. You also might be a pain-in-the-ass (Oops, did I say that out loud? I am sure that you're a very sweet person. Sorry if I offend.) Either way, that's your answer if you were wondering about the names we were thinking about.

So, we're having a baby.

2008-12-11T19:13:00.000-08:00

I know, I know. I've written before how I just wanted more time (or forever). I wanted to be selfish. Blah, blah, blah...

After I wrote that blog, I thought that I was pregnant. This was about early August. I was crying. Stomping my feet even. I was so mad at myself for being irresponsible. And also mad at myself for being angry about something so nice. I kept taking home pregnancy tests. Nothing. I went to the doctor. He said, "I see nothing." Then I went for a blood test. Nothing. Negative.

To my disbelief, I felt so sad. I felt a loss that hurt really badly. I felt ashamed that I could have been so selfish (but honest and realistic) before.

So, I drank many beers and glasses of wine to end the summer. We went camping. We went to Great Adventure and rode many, many roller coasters. But, after all this (and during) I still felt different. Some weeks had past and I took another pregnancy test.

Positive.

I went to the doctor. The doctor said, "Wow, that was fast!" Then the doctor takes a look and says, "Wow. This is a big baby!" He looked perplexed. The new doc with him looked perplexed. Len and I were confused. He then said, "The blood test must have been wrong. This baby is about six weeks old already."

There's the story. I am now a very proud pregnant mom-to-be of a little girl (if the doctor is right about this). I am very excited! Everyone is happy. I have a new (different) outlook on life and how much more wonderful it will become. Who knew this would feel so good!?

Alla Shchegol

2008-08-14T11:04:00.000-07:00

Alla Shchegol and her mansion on Todt Hill make me want to vomit. I just wanted to get that off of my chest. Len saw an article today and sent it to me reminding me of how barf-a-licious her lawn ornaments are.

http://www.silive.com/eastshore/index.ssf/2008/08/coming_soon_to_todt_hill_an_el.html

Allergy Shots

2008-08-13T08:33:00.000-07:00

I knew that I was allergic to a lot of things, but this is ridiculous. It is even worse than when I was younger. The nurse that tested me asked how sensitive I thought that I was so that she could determine the level of allergens to place onto my arms. I pleaded with her to give me the LOWEST dose possible...this is what the lowest dose looked like!!!

Mostly grasses and weeds did the worse to me. The biggest blob was from timothy hay. That is really crappy because that is the main source of nourishment for my bunny. Now I am wondering, am I allergic to Sam or just what he eats. Hmmm...

I asked the doctor what he thought about it and he made a gesture and some sort of comment that gave me the impression that I should leave the doctoring up to him.

One of These Things First

2008-08-11T13:47:00.000-07:00

I love this song. It's on the Garden State soundtrack. It's by Nick drake. I want to use it in a home movie someday. It's pretty.

<--------Here are the words on the left.

Snow and Boobies

2008-08-11T07:42:00.002-07:00

I am watching the movie Being John Malkovich. I love this movie. It may be the combination of how original it is, because I love John Cusack and because I think that Cameron Diaz is hot.

In the movie, Lotte (Cameron Diaz) says that there are 49 words that Eskimos use for snow. So of course I had to google that. There are websites that say, No! That's not true! Then as I was reading about only 10 words for snow, I saw a link that says, "Americans have more than 40 words for boobies". Do you want to know them? Well, look at this link:

Americans have more than 40 words for boobies@Everything2.com

Isn't that funny?

How the do I make this stop being underlined??? Well, anyway, if you could pay $200 to see through anyone's eyes for 15 minutes, before you are tossed onto the side of the New Jersey Turnpike, who would it be?

I would like to be really tall, like in the body of a supermodel or something.

2008-08-11T07:42:00.001-07:00

Six things that make me happy...

2008-08-11T06:53:00.000-07:00

This post is in response to Renee's post...
This is possibly a hard question to answer...

1. LuLu, my dog is an incredible source of joy! I have never had a bad day with her!

2. Being married! Sorry Len, LuLu's days are numbered, she must come first! You will outlive her and eventually be first!

3. Concerts, live music

4. The night sky, especially when upstate

5. Reading a hand-written note from someone special (some e-mails are just as good though)

6. A great night out with friends

Well, that's only six, but there are so many more things! What about quiet time alone? What about french fries with gravy and mozzarella cheese? What about my students? What about sushi? What about winning? What about catching small animals and petting them whether they like it or not?

I guess that there are lots of ways that I can feel happy!

That's good right?

Retraction...

2008-08-01T09:37:00.001-07:00

She didn't die in the movie, she was only shot and nearly died. I jumped the gun on that one! She was in the movie a lot! I give it two and a half stars...the movie held my attention.

Cate Blanchett

2008-07-31T20:50:00.000-07:00

I really don't watch that many movies, not that I don't like to, I just don't always get to it...So what are the chances that the two movies that I happen to see today both have Cate Blanchett in them. That is so random to me!

So right now I am watching Babel, but before I watched most of Notes on a Scandal.

Oh, well, that's weird, now she just died, so I guess that she's not in this movie all that much anyway!

On another note, really I wish that the lady next door did not move in! She always keeps her side light on and really ruins my nighttime vision for skywatching! It is such a clear night out! How frustrating!

Not feeling so terrible anymore...

2008-07-28T09:18:00.000-07:00

So, I have come to terms with this situation...I think...

When push comes to shove, it'll happen when it happens, right? I was just feeling like it was all happening too fast (house and baby???). So, I'll take a rest from thinking about it. We'll enjoy the summer and go on a camping trip. We will have fun.

That's all!

Feeling terrible...

2008-07-20T21:48:00.000-07:00

And I don't know why! I have some inklings, but I feel so embarrassed to share them with people because, oh, they are such selfish thoughts!!

I really think that this having a child thing is weighing on my life! Everyone who has even gotten married understands what this feels like-as soon as you have a ring on your finger, you must be wanting to have a child...I just never felt that way! Well, I can't say never, but it's very rare and comes in short bursts.

I like pets. I like taking care of them. They like me. When I am finished with a pet, most times I can put it away or say, "Go lay down already!"

I used to have this dream all of the time about having a baby. But it's not what most people would think of a 'having a baby' type of dream. It was more like I owned the baby. It was more like a talking doll. It was really cute. It was a black baby boy, with sort of rosy cheeks and dimples. It always laughs a lot in the dream, and I seem to enjoy having it around. Then, abruptly, the dream always ends like this: I look at it and say, "Okay, time to go away now," and then I open a dresser drawer and in it goes. I make sure that it is closed shut and TIGHT. I smile.

That's usually when I wake up and say to myself, "Ah, that fucked up dream with the baby again." I get really weirded out by it. I haven't had it lately, but for some reason, I think that it says a lot about how I feel about kids.

Now yes, I am a first grade teacher, and I love my job. No one seems to understand one aspect of this job that I like the best-the kids go home to their families! I just teach them, and I am good at that. I do not bathe them, feed them and entertain them. After work I get to entertain myself (which isn't even as often as I would like!) and hang out. Sometimes, and I mean sometimes, I cook. I like to have a clean house. I like to make stuff and I like to waste away many, many hours on the Internet. I like to read. I even like to work more after work. When in the hell would I do any of these things if I had a child (or two or three???).

I just can't see it.

I am so afraid of being resentful of this little person for stealing away the little amounts of time that I have for myself. See, another part of the problem is that I don't like doing things in a half-assed way. So that means that I'd really have to give 'my all' at doing this mommy thing and I don't see how it balances out. I am sure that anyone with kids reading this thinks that I'm crazy or selfish or just plain dumb, but I don't know what to say, and maybe I agree with you.

The tertiary layer to this situation is that I married a man who wants a family. How could I not give him one? I mean, I think that it's something that I agreed to when I said, "I do."

So my options are obvious. I could:

#1-Grin and bear it and just try to have the thing already.

#2-Try to wait longer, maybe I'll feel differently.

#3-Not and say that tried, but on second thought, maybe trying wasn't the best idea.

There are also obvious consequences for these options! The third may leave me kicking myself in the ass years down the line. My husband will say that he's supportive but will deep-down inside be miserable. I may end up like that famous cartoon that says, "I CAN'T BELIEVE IT. I FORGOT TO HAVE CHILDREN!"

The second option will just probably torture me more and really put more of a strain on everyday life, especially since we've already 'started trying'.

The first option is what I am going with right now, which is why I am so troubled. As I write this, it already may be too late to oppose it! (But I hope not because I really drank way too much last night!) Who knows what's right, I just know that I don't feel comfortable with the whole thing.

Yesterday, I was told by a friend that I am old. So I feel so bad about that too (like, really bad). It's probably making up for the other huge part of me that feels pretty crappy. Maybe this is a reason to move forward then. I just don't want to be old and 'used up'. It's not fair. Life is just too short to sit around and feel this confused though! I was much happier not thinking about it!

Can't I just have a puppy instead?

Sitting in an empty room.

2008-06-16T19:05:00.000-07:00

I am so loving sitting here on the floor of my new office/craft/study room in my new house! I can't believe that I actually own this big old thing! It's just great! Soon we will have furniture and I will surely have my hands full for the summer!